Humans have emotions both on a personal level (fear, stress, anxiety, insecurity, frustration, etc) and on a social level (love, anger, shame, pride, etc). They occur in varying degrees throughout life. Your ability to express your feelings and control the acceptability of them is a function of your self-concept and willingness to self-regulate*. 

When these feelings do hit, your commitment to tradeoffs is tested. Decision-making determines the reality of your state of well-being (Páez-Gallego, J., Gallardo-López, J. A., López-Noguero, F., & Rodrigo-Moriche, M. P. (2020)).

An exchange must be made from old habits (both in thinking and doing) to new habits that you are willing to form to reach a goal. Anticipate these pivotal tradeoff decisions. Don't be thrown off course by reacting to feelings without some regulation - it is part of balancing your psycho-social nature. Expect temporary tension from unexpected events in life and design a strategy to prevent setbacks while in route to goal fulfillment. When feelings line up with healthy goals, cognitive consistency is present in your newly acquired behavior, promoting your integrity, productivity and sense of well-being.

• When you are caught in an unhealthy addiction, will you make the necessary trade-offs to rebalance your life?

• Will you be pushed back into old habits or will you intentionally face the strain of change? ​

• Read more here about how to use emotional feelings "as an innate guidance system that is essential to optimal human health, psychosocial development, moral conscience, and even spiritual experiences".

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When sadness accompanies an unexpected event, both logic and hope can be illusive. While stress management techniques or numbing the pain of emotion may work to relieve unwanted feelings, they are only temporary solutions to rid yourself from the effects of stress/pain. To have a longer-term impact, stress management must include a change in thinking that influences both your feelings and your behavior so you can make daily decisions that are in line with the achievement of the new goal. Don't let the temptation of finding immediate relief of an unwanted feeling undermine your long-term goal. A change of thinking needs to be fueled by self-reflection. A closer review of why you do as you do will reveal the effectiveness of your daily habits. For example, are you doing impulsive actions or are they intentional in that they align with your bigger picture goal in life, despite daily difficulties? Make every day decisions that align with your goals in life and avoid seeking short-term decisions.

• Take the self quizzes in the "Capture your Vision" tab to try to determine what interferes in your drive for excellence?

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Resiliency is the name for the trait that shows your capacity to recover quickly from unwelcome life events because of a confident hope. Push through the discomfort of performance tension as you change by using the enthusiasm that your new identity in Christ provides so you choose to ignite the power of the Hoy Spirit in you! Long-term relief from addiction comes when you are willing to trade your own will power, your own A, B, C’s, for the Spirit infused power, C   because of Hope. When you are willing to trade self-reliance for Christ’s sufficiency, you will be equipped with the power to overcome temptation (1 Corinthians 10:13, 2 Corinthians 3:5). You gain confidence and strength from your acceptance of and dependence on Christ because of your free-will decision to trade your old self for a new identity hidden in Christ (Colossians 3:1-3). When your “needs for love, belongingness, and worthiness” are met by God, you the gain the confidence and strength you need to endure trials and to attract healthy relationships that will support those habits along the journey through life (Brown, B., 2012, p. 217, Haslam, et al, 2009). When you choose to trust Christ, your Attitude and Behaviors are infused by the power of the Holy Spirit so your Consequences reflect your faith; D(A+B) = C   (Joshua 1:7-9).

 

Your new identity in Christ, the Holy Spirit in you, D, steers your problem-solving, decision-making and resulting actions because you have the mind of Christ, which enables you to approach situations from God's perspective (1 Corinthians 2:15-16). This view lets you see your freedom in Christ - the freedom that comes from your ability to choose to follow Him. It is your choice to express your renewed mind through your choice of actions because your actions communicate your beliefs. There is a cost to this decision. Will you use choose to believe in the character of God and voluntarily impose boundaries on yourself (the ability to judge) so that what you say you want, you do

(1 Peter 3:10, Matthew 5:37). It takes courage *to implement the decisions you need to make to see your hope materialize. You are more likely to choose a Godly option when you are conscientious and humble enough to accept the boundaries placed on your behavior by authority - both God’s and man’s (Romans 13:1, 1 Samuel 26:21-24, 1 John 2:5-6).

• *Courage is defined here from a Christian perspective; the voluntary desire and accompanying action to implement long-term, self-sacrificial decisions.   

• There is freedom that comes with knowing it is your choice to live inside the boundaries of God's principles,  summarized in Appendix 1G and applied in Appendix 2H.

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Hope, courage and resiliency are yours when your self-worth and your thoughts are founded on and grounded in an identity in Christ (Matthew 7:24-25). Dependence on yourself or anybody else is futile-it’s like spinning your wheels while expecting to arrive at your destination (2 Corinthians 12:10, Philippians 4:19).​ People who make Godly, confident decisions don’t say to themselves “why me” when trouble from this world arises, instead, they say, “why not me”? Renewing your mind to God's truth is the basis for an optimistic attitude because when you make up your mind to hope in Christ, you believe that no matter what circumstances come your way, you can persevere because of your knowledgeable Christian faith (Philippians 4:12-13,8, 3:14, Romans 5:3-5, 12:12, 2 Peter 1:2-3).